Last month I had the privilege of toasting my parents at their grand event celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. Here is the toast:
Mom & Dad,
I’m grateful to have been part of your adventure for (most of) these last 50 years. There have been many ups and downs, joys and heartaches, and I have learned so much from both of you as you’ve encouraged me to likewise, “Take the Adventure, heed the call, now ere the irrevocable moment passes!’*
In reflecting on all that I’ve gleaned from you both over the years, I’ve realized how much you’ve shaped the core values that define my life and the lives of others.
Some of my favorite memories of you, Mom, are our annual outings to Disneyland and Knott’s Berry Farm, especially the day we conquered the roller coaster.
How many of you (in the audience) have heard of the Montezuma’s Revenge roller coaster at Knott’s Berry Farm in southern California? Apparently it is about as old as I am and is now a historic landmark with the national American Coaster Enthusiasts organization. I hear that it has been closed for refurbishing recently and is expected to re-open soon with a slightly different name.
As a young teen, I loved roller coasters, and when I was finally old enough and tall enough to ride Montezuma’s Revenge, Mom agreed to go with me. We waited in the long, long line until it finally got to our turn—to go from 0 to 55 mph in under 5 seconds.
For those of you who have never had the pleasure: when riding the shuttle coaster, you first go upside-down through a 76-ft vertical loop before rushing up a near-vertical 148-ft dead-end tower spike, and then you repeat the track in reverse, at full speed, and up a rear near-vertical dead-end tower 112-ft tall.
Mom and I screamed all the way forwards and backwards, and when we staggered from the shuttle back onto the platform, barely catching our breaths, mom said, “Let’s do it again!”
Did you like it? I asked.
“No,” you said, “But I won't let it conquer me!”
I have treasured this example of fierce tenacity ever since. In our family, we do hard things and don’t give up.
In
high school, Dad taught me two lessons I’ll never forget: to look for
and care for the outsiders, the social outcasts, regardless of what
anyone thinks of you for doing so. Dad, you taught me to judge others
not by how popular or successful they were, but by how they loved
others, even the “least of these.”
On the flip side, and since I
was so successfully at being heedless of others’ opinions—and with full
awareness of the stubborn, independent streak that runs in our
family—Dad drove home to me the advice of the sage writer of Proverbs to
always seek counsel and embrace correction: “The way of a fool is right
in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise” (Prov. 12:15) and
“He who disdains instruction despises his own soul, but he who heeds
rebuke gets understanding” (Prov. 15:32). Because of your example and
exhortation, I have learned the value of collaboration.
Finally,
from both of you, through your example, I have learned that while there
are essentials in our faith, faithfulness sometimes looks different for
different people. Like Lucy in Prince Caspian in the Chronicles of Narnia,
sometimes we see Aslan when no one else does, and we must follow where
he is leading us even if others do not see the way. You have given me
the gift of freedom in Christ—freedom to follow Christ as He leads me
even if it is a different path from your own. And I have seen you give
that gift to others as well.
Thank you for showing me, through
your words and in your example, throughout your marriage, how to live
tenaciously, collaboratively, and with grace, faithfulness, and freedom.
As you continue through your great adventure, I hope that, like the friends in The Wind in the Willows, “…some
day, some day long hence, … when the cup has been drained and the play
has been played,” you may “sit down by your quiet river with a store of
goodly memories for company.”*
Cheers to Mom & Dad!
* Kenneth Grahame, The Wind in the Willows
